*Trips in over the sword, crashes to the table, spills the cookies, almost lands in the fireplace.*

 Hello. *Stands up, sits down*

 Um, oh yes, I'm back. I don't have a lot of writing to share with you this time, but more of a, "Does this sound better?" Thingy. So, here it is. 

 Not edited

The scream of a falling bomb sliced through the deep, nighttime silence like a knife. It woke Peter Jones with a start, for a moment making him forget all his training. He listened in horror, knowing something was very wrong, but not knowing that bomb was the start of a terrible war.


The screaming grew louder the closer the bomb got and Peter shot up in his cot just as the alarms went off. The alarms were almost as loud as the bomb and even though Peter was not fully awake he knew what he had to do. Leaping to his feet, he grabbed his clothing and threw them on. Stumbling toward the door, he tripped and crashed into things as he fought to pull his boots on. There were other men in the barracks who were faring no better with their clothing and boots. Many times the men crashed into each other, knocking one another down.

 Edited

The scream of a falling bomb sliced through the deep, nighttime silence like a knife. The sound woke Peter Jones with a start, for a moment making him forget all his military training. He listened in horror, not knowing that the bomb heralded the start of a terrible war.

The screaming grew louder and Peter shot up in his cot just as the alarms went off. The alarms were almost as loud as the bomb and even though sleep still blurred Peter's eyes his muddled brain started to work and he moved without thinking. Leaping to his feet, he grabbed his clothing and threw them on. Stumbling toward the door, he tripped and crashed into things as he fought to pull on and lace up his boots. There were other men in the barracks who were faring no better with their clothing and boots. Many times the men crashed into each other, knocking one another down.

Better? Or no? 

Jack and her Sardine Nemo